• Jim Donaher

Why Am I Insecure?

Okay, I'll admit it (but only if you do too). I'm insecure.


Everyone is, to some degree, even if they show to be just the opposite. Because who really knows if they're 'any good' or not?

So begins the lie that Satan whispers in our ear, with his only goal being to delay and derail God's purpose for your life. He wants you ignore the facts, which are:

  • You were created by God, who loves you, and who only wants you to love Him.

  • God loves you so much that He sent his only son to earth to be killed, in order to save you and promise you eternal life. (John 3:16)

  • He blessed you with uniqueness. Unique talents, skills, abilities, traits. No two of us are alike. Each of us, a God-crafted work of art. (Psalm 139:14)

  • It can't be emphasized enough - God loves you.

So the Enemy can't have you focused on facts, and the best way to accomplish that is with a series of lies.

  • You're ugly

  • You're dumb

  • You're old

  • You're fat

  • You could never (fill in the blank with something good)

  • Nobody loves you

There are billions of variations on the theme, all of which undermine your self-worth as a child of God. And we believe them, in part because these are more easily observed, superficial and are more likely to be validated by those around us.


You want to feel special? Just as you are unique, the particular combination of lies you're being told are, as game show host Bob Eubanks used to say, 'A special prize chosen just for youuuu.' They are tailored to hit you in all of your vulnerable places. Their timing and detail are always on target and the results are devastating.


You have a few options to fight back. Please note, these are NOT recommendations - because they do NOT work:

  • You can literally fight back. When attacked, you can throw down, verbally or physically, to defend yourself.

  • You can demean and belittle others to take the spotlight off you.

  • You can laugh at yourself to defuse the attack (this works a little better for adults than kids)

  • You can withdraw. If they can't see you, they can't hurt you.

  • You can agree. You can let the lies become your truth. Sounds crazy, but this might be the most common response.

So what do you do?


First, a few caveats. One is that this is hard. It's suffering, it's part of living in a broken world. Satan lies, others believe it and confirm it for you, and your self-worth plummets. And your faith, if you had any, can get snuffed out.


Another caveat is that, in the moment, there may be no satisfactory way to handle it. In the playground scenario, where you're being laughed at, you may just have to endure it. Same is true in more subtle situations, particularly as we get older and the implications of your 'flaws' become more worrisome to you.


A third caveat, which is related to the second, is that the right solution, though it really does work, may not show a payoff immediately. In fact it may take many years, maybe your whole life.


So what is the answer?


Believe the one who created everything and everyone and the entire world. Everything. Including you. You are His beloved child. You are his unique, precious, one-of-a-kind masterpiece. There are literally no others like you. YOU are special.

"The Lord your God in your midst, The Mighty One, will save; He will rejoice over you with gladness, He will quiet you with His love, He will rejoice over you with singing.” Zephaniah 3:17


Believe that, having been created by God, there is no limit to what you can do. He loves you and will help you do all the good things you attempt, as they are His will and He has equipped YOU to accomplish them.

“I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.” Philippians 4:13


Believe that God will not forget you. Even if you struggle in the short term, and you will, He has His eye on you. He loves you and His love will lead you to an eternity with Him in Heaven.

"These things I have spoken to you, that in Me you may have peace. In the world you will have tribulation; but be of good cheer, I have overcome the world.” John 16:33


Insecurity hurts. It limits. It undermines. It steals. It is a lie.


Belief in the One who made you heals. It removes limits. It endorses and affirms. It returns all that was taken and adds to it.


Belief overwhelms, routs and obliterates insecurity.


Belief saves you.


God bless you!

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